Thursday, May 8, 2008

Oh, I oughtta...

...tell you right now who the winner of this little contest is, but I'm not gonna do that. Not yet, first I want to tell you how much I love all of the blog friends I have made over the last 100 posts, some of which I speak with, via email, on a daily basis and I feel like I have known them forever. There are others that I am just becoming acquainted with and am anxious to get to know better. Then I am going to tell you about an Oh, I oughtta story of my own.

Imagine, if you will, a rainy spring day a couple of years ago. I had taken my only nephew and my youngest niece to McDonald's for lunch. We had a wonderful lunch experience. We dined on the finest that McDonald's has to offer, played in the Play Place until we couldn't play anymore and were on our way to the car to go home and (hopefully) take a very long nap.

As we approached the door we encountered a man with two children who appeared to be about the same age as my niece and nephew. The man held the door open for us and his children and we all stepped out onto the sidewalk. Just as we were all about to cross the parking lot to our respective cars, another car driven by a very young, inexperienced driver came screeching (yes, I said screeching) around the corner of the building and narrowly missed hitting the man, the four children, and me.

If it had just been me, I probably would have just watched him pass and gone on with my day, but there were four little kids and you don't do anything to endanger children when I am around. Besides, how would he have lived with himself if he would have hurt one of them, or worse? So I felt it was my duty to yell at him to slow down in the parking lot.

I won't repeat what he said to me, all I can say is that I hope he doesn't kiss his mother with that mouth.

It was at that point that my brain said, "Oh, I oughtta..." but before my brain was able to complete that thought my right arm took control of the situation and hurled the go cup full of iced tea that I was carrying. It landed smackdab in the middle of the back window on his car. Now, I don't know if you have ever thrown a paper cup full of iced tea at anyone (seems a lot of people haven't), but when it hit the back window the paper cup collapsed, the lid popped off and iced tea went everyfreakinwhere. It was like a little caffeinated, artificially sweetened hand grenade. It was beautiful.

The potty-mouth-punk-kid stopped his car and got out. The man asked me (told me) to take all of the kids and go back inside. He said something to him and the kid got back in his car and left. The man then came in to get his children and (laughing) told me to get in my car and go home without throwing anything at anyone else. I told him I would, and I did.

So there you have it, that is about the sum total of my bad-assedness. Now we'll move on to the real reason we're all here...the contest.

And the winner is...

From the great state of Michigan...

The beautiful...

The talented...

wait for it...

Tracyb

Email me with your mailing address so I can got your pink/brown/purple/copper yumminess in the mail to you right away.

Here's what I'm thankful for:

1. I am thankful that no one was hurt that day in the McDonald's parking lot.

2. I am thankful for men that will stand up for helpless children and loud mouth women in McDonald's parking lots.

3. I am thankful that I'd already had enough of that iced tea.

14 comments:

Marianne said...

Congrats to Tracyb!

Jeeze.... your story... glad no one was hurt....

Bea said...

Congrats to the winner. Well you are certainly a badass. At least you made the kid have to wash his car...

Anonymous said...

Congratulations to Tracyb.

Good for you; I would have thought about throwing something, but don't think I would have had the nerve.

Kristina B said...

A great oughtta story. However, I must lodge an unofficial complaint - you seem to be discriminating against Canadians in your contest.

Should be used to that by now. Sigh.

tracyb said...

Oh my gosh! I have never won anything before! Thank you, thank you thank you!

tracyb said...

And let me just say . . . I LOVE that you whipped the ice tea! I only wish I had the cojones to do such a thing!

Turtle said...

Lol, ok i may have done the same thing as you had, but good thng the man was there.
Congrats Tracyb!

Cindy said...

I have commented twice and gotten nothin. One more try. I loved your story. It made me laugh. I enjoy these because they tell about ourselves and our foibles. And, congrats to tracyb

Cass said...

YOU GO! How funny.

You won my contest! Come see! :)

kathy b said...

Oh you make me laugh. Thank goodness for your angel man! Do you know heather mills?

Cindy said...

Just checking. Did the storms get to you?

Hobbygåsa said...

Congratulations Tracy! And funny story Amy! Have a nice week!

Holly Bee said...

You winged the ice tea, and you had back up!!!

Two big yip-yips for the state o' MI!!

Thanks for all the fun too!

Eric & Tony said...

Good for you for telling that punk off! But please only do that when there is a bad ass present to keep you safe.